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Profile

Stanley, 06.22.89
殷亿 - Chinese
ｽﾀﾝレｰ - Jap
陳殷億 - Chinese
ちんいんおく- Jap
스탠리 - Korean
สแตนเล่ย์ - Thai
Life is too short to be Negative
Airpork?
22June1989
Cancer
In NP(BS)
Was in CVSS
Was in SKPS
The Smart one
The Lost one
The Sorrow one
The Fat one

陈君有志行四方
殷人一筹气轩昂
亿园广进达三江
榜上题名鸿运昌

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朱天林 Steven 农历6月初2 7/23
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Archives

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Felt so much better after watching Shin Ae and Alex past memories during lunch break. I think I am crazy or nuts really =D. Perhaps I am too introverted I guess! I do not know why I have such thoughts in my mind, but is just that I realized I have been withdrawing too much and have been going inner and inner! Getting more and more drained during work and I am getting more and more emotional and tired. Am I looking forward? I guess I am not!

Perhaps is my personalities, hate to serve (POH) people. Hate to do things that are out of my principle. Hate to do things just to please others. Maybe these are why people say that I might never succeed in the working world! But who cares! I really dislike working for others and following people’s order. I hate to climb corporate ladder and I hate fighting just to reach the top. What I really care of now is just to do my job well and go back home. Guess this is really a good opportunity for me, because it tells my clearly how I am not suited to work in a company.

I would rather be poor, or not as wealthy, than me being upset everyday for not doing what I want and what I love. I tried my best to use my passion to do the job, but am really draining all my passion toward life. It is so hectic in work!

Is being nice a wrong move?
I guess what XL said was correct!
I always keep thing inside and not throwing it out! Is really unhealthy! Cause everyone cup has a limited to how much it can fill. I have been over pouring it that I am really tired and upset! I wanted to pour it out, but there is no one here to listen to me!

Sometime I was wondering how I wish I could be like red fire where I can just let my emotion run and not to control them all the time. I really hope I could! But I something is always pulling me not to do! My heart will always tell me to 忍！Endure it! 忍一时风平浪静，退一步海阔天空。 But how much a person can a person endure it? I always know when to activate my emotion, at work I will never bring house emotion in! But others just bring it in and rub it hard.

Perhaps I should be more mean and blunt in speaking! Just let the temper go off and scream at others. But I just cannot do it; I am too like my father who always kept it to himself. Perhaps I always keep it myself, misunderstanding manifest.

Want to see the sea, want to hear the wind